Adam Grant

@AdamMGrant • 870,796 subscribers

Organizational psychologist @Wharton. #1 NYT bestsellers: THINK AGAIN, HIDDEN POTENTIAL. Podcasts: Re:Thinking & WorkLife @TEDTalks. Former diver and magician.

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People pleasing is not about concern for others. It’s about concern for their acceptance and approval.

When people struggle under pressure, it doesn’t mean they lack resilience. It often means they lack practice.

Being obsessed with happiness can make us unhappy. Joy doesn't arise from ruminating about our emotions. It comes from immersing ourselves in worthwhile experiences. Happiness is not a goal to pursue. It's a byproduct of leading a life of meaning and engagement. Trevor Noah

The person who talks the most is the most likely to become the leader. Regardless of intelligence and expertise, groups elevate those who command the most airtime. It's time to stop rewarding people for dominating the discussion, and start valuing quality over quantity.

People are more open to constructive criticism when it’s clear that you believe in their potential and care about their growth.

The hallmark of an open mind is refusing to let your ideas become your identity. If you define yourself by your opinions, questioning them is a threat to your integrity. If you see yourself as a curious person or a lifelong learner, changing your mind is a moment of growth.

Who do you follow because they make you think, even when you disagree?

Growing up, too many kids have their career aspirations limited by the examples they see around them. When the destination is invisible, the path feels impossible. Introducing new role models today expands options for tomorrow. This is how to show kids what's possible.

When you’ve made a mistake, refusing to apologize is not a sign of strength. It’s a mark of narcissism. Malcolm Gladwell and I discuss:

You probably know some people who air their grievances like every day is Festivus. It turns out that this is a strategy that selfish people often use to signal virtue without having to model it.

Many people mistake warmth for integrity. The fact that someone is nice to us doesn't mean they'll do right by us. Trustworthiness can't be judged in one interaction. It has to be observed over time. People with strong principles honor their commitments to us and to others.

Bad bosses insist that work comes first. They reward workaholism and punish outside interests. Good bosses support balance. They encourage nights &amp; weekends off. Great bosses expect people to put loved ones above their jobs. They forbid missing important family events for work.

One more time: A company is not a family. Healthy workplaces value results as well as relationships.

Instead of seeking feedback on how you did, it’s more effective to seek advice on how you can do better.

Sharing your work is not selfish. It's an act of self-expression and social contribution. Promoting your ideas is different from promoting yourself. Self-promotion shouts, “Look at me!” Idea-promotion says, “I have something to offer." Don’t deprive the world of your ingenuity.

Research shows that kids are facing growing pressure from parents. It’s time to break free:

Counting your blessings is good for happiness. Counting your contributions is better for motivation.

Coping with stress doesn’t require a constant focus on the present. Resilience lies in reflecting on past struggles and future possibilities.

Bad bosses insist that work comes first. They reward workaholism and punish outside interests. Good bosses support balance. They encourage nights & weekends off. Great bosses expect people to put loved ones above their jobs. They forbid missing important family events for work.