Preeti Choudhry
@PreetiChoudhry • 70,358 subscribers
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How dare women be crass? How dare women be angry? How dare women occupy public spaces without first proving they are dignified enough to deserve that space? That is the burden we women have carried for generations..the burden of respectability. And it is precisely that burden these young women refused to carry. We, as millennial women, were raised on those expectations. We were taught that a woman must be graceful, calm, composed, demure; that she must make her point politely and with dignity. We lived through those standards... - Every step outside those boundaries invited judgment. Every act of defiance came with a price. Ms Ranaut - we are millennials , we cared. We measured every word. We watched every step. We carried the burden of respectability everywhere. They don't... and dare we pass that burden on to them ..they deserve better because we know we deserved better -
Preeti Choudhry421,000 views • 1 month ago
My take : Rarely do I personalise stories. But sometimes one must. Because I come from privilege. And let me use a cliché here - agency. I am fortunate to have both. I come from Haryana. I am married to someone who hails from western Uttar Pradesh. To say that either state ranks poorly on gender justice indices would be the polite version of the truth. My husband and I are also fortunate to still have familial roots in our ancestral villages. And every time I visit whether my village or his -the blessing is almost always the same: “Dudho nahao, puto phalo.” .. back in in the cities ... it translates loosely to: may you be the mother of a hundred sons - . In the village it's always said Literally In the city rarely said aloud but very precisely understood: may you become the mother of sons, because in this country even one son can dramatically elevate a families social standing. A son becomes status. Security. Social capital. He is the lifelong investment expected to yield lifelong returns. The one relationship through which hierarchy can be asserted - just by the virtue of gender - a son - And so the logic begins early. If there are only two glasses of milk, the son gets one not the daughter, sometimes not even the mother. If there is money for only one child’s education, it goes to the son, even if the daughter is brighter, more ambitious, more capable. Investment, after all, is expected to bring returns. And from that logic flows an entire ecosystem: dowry, control, dependence, harassment, silence. What we often describe as “tradition” is, in reality, an economic and social structure built around the premium value assigned to sons. Even when the son is getting married - the privilege of that association is understood to be so acute that the girls family should naturally bear all expenses of the wedding . The tragedy is not only that women are oppressed by it. The tragedy is also that many women are compelled to uphold it, because in deeply unequal systems survival itself becomes transactional. so we can continue to pontificate on #Twisha's death, but we all know the one brutal truth that killed her - we did - we killed twisha : the obsessive premium we attach to a male child. The lifelong social privilege of a “son” has created collateral damage for every woman alive in India . This desire cuts across class, caste, and religion alike. Twisha is dead. But her story survives in the collective, generational silence of women who endured but survived. women who, in some form, exist in each of our homes... and we all know them - very often we are them !
Preeti Choudhry63,010 views • 4 months ago
My Take : The last 24 hours have exposed an uncomfortable truth: ideology may divide our political class, but misogyny unites it. Yesterday, Rahul Gandhi held a press conference attacking the Modi government’s diplomatic approach. Standing beside him was Congress leader Sandeep Dikshit. Gandhi hugged him to make a point about diplomacy. Dikshit then joked: “Did you hug me thinking I was Meloni?” — referring to Italian Prime Minister Giorgia Meloni. Gandhi replied: “I have not reached there yet.” It was a cheap joke. And it was deeply sexist. - but casual sexism is part of our politics - Giorgia Meloni is a democratically elected world leader, not a prop for political banter. If the Congress wants to speak credibly about gender justice, Sandeep Dikshit should have apologised ... plainly and publicly. No excuses. No deflection. No double standards. The BJP was absolutely entitled to demand that apology. But then the BJP did what Indian politics does far too often: it answered misogyny with more misogyny. BJP leader Nishikant Dubey posted a photograph of Indira Gandhi embracing Fidel Castro and asked whether Rahul Gandhi would call that “lust ” Think about that choice. There are countless photographs of former PM and congress leader Rajiv Gandhi embracing foreign dignitaries. But Mr Dubey chose Indira Gandhi. And then attached a sexual insinuation to the image. So an insult to Giorgia Meloni was answered with an insult to Indira Gandhi. Different parties. Same instinct. Put a woman at the centre of the punchline. And that is the point. This is not about defending the Congress. Sandeep Dikshit was wrong. He should apologise. It is also not about defending the BJP. Nishikant Dubey’s response was equally revealing. Because misogyny does not become acceptable when it is used as political retaliation. Women should not become ammunition every time politicians run out of arguments. Not Giorgia Meloni. Not Indira Gandhi. Not any woman. So yes, ideology divides our political class. But when it comes to using women as the easiest targets in a political fight, they seem remarkably united.
Preeti Choudhry18,667 views • 1 month ago
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