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Simpsons Quotes

@Simpsons_tweets • 468,279 subscribers

One of the most cromulent fan accounts about the Simpsons. DM suggestions!

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This is a simple lie detector. I'll ask you a few yes or no questions and you just answer truthfully.

This is a simple lie detector. I'll ask you a few yes or no questions and you just answer truthfully.

266,345 views

Five days? But I'm mad now!

Five days? But I'm mad now!

107,120 views

What's he doin' with that broom?

What's he doin' with that broom?

92,644 views

Hey, fellas, the "garage." Well, ooh, la-di-da, Mr. Frenchman.

Hey, fellas, the "garage." Well, ooh, la-di-da, Mr. Frenchman.

70,188 views

Or what? You'll release the dogs or the bees...

Or what? You'll release the dogs or the bees...

52,521 views

Knife goes in, guts come out.

Knife goes in, guts come out.

1,427,180 views

I sleep in a racing car. Do you?

I sleep in a racing car. Do you?

124,073 views

Ooh, he card reads good.

Ooh, he card reads good.

66,827 views

Homer, do you remember the way you acted at the party last night?

Homer, do you remember the way you acted at the party last night?

149,772 views

Knife goes in, guts come out.

Sensitive content

Knife goes in, guts come out.

3,479,536 views

"Look at that! I'm the first non-Brazilian person to travel backwards through time."

"Look at that! I'm the first non-Brazilian person to travel backwards through time."

5,038,824 views

Roads closed. Pipes frozen. Albinos virtually invisible.

Roads closed. Pipes frozen. Albinos virtually invisible.

568,265 views

It's a two party system. You have to vote for one of us. #ElectionDay

It's a two party system. You have to vote for one of us. #ElectionDay

1,326,390 views

Just like the time I could've met Mr. T. at the mall.

Just like the time I could've met Mr. T. at the mall.

52,147 views

Uh, sir, why don't you just use real cows?

Uh, sir, why don't you just use real cows?

54,783 views

Somebody ordered the London Symphony Orchestra...possibly while high.

Somebody ordered the London Symphony Orchestra...possibly while high.

1,088,444 views

Another placemat, sir?

Another placemat, sir?

983,672 views

I got nothing against him, but I'm definitely gonna make orphans of his children. #PaulTyson

I got nothing against him, but I'm definitely gonna make orphans of his children. #PaulTyson

853,523 views

"Put out an A.P.B. on a Uosdwis R. Dewoh."

"Put out an A.P.B. on a Uosdwis R. Dewoh."

1,203,640 views

"Bart, I have a riddle for you. What's the sound of one hand clapping?"

"Bart, I have a riddle for you. What's the sound of one hand clapping?"

1,336,113 views

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Help me, Dr. Zaius!

Help me, Dr. Zaius!

Simpsons Quotes

5,032,350 views • 1 year ago

$"Whoever brings down that balloon doesn't have to learn fractions!"$

"Whoever brings down that balloon doesn't have to learn fractions!"

Simpsons Quotes

4,080,392 views • 2 years ago

"Help me, Dr. Zaius!"

"Help me, Dr. Zaius!"

Simpsons Quotes

3,304,227 views • 2 years ago

What's a donut?

What's a donut?

Simpsons Quotes

1,504,779 views • 1 year ago

"Here's Eastern Europe's favorite cat and mouse team, 'Worker and Parasite'!”

"Here's Eastern Europe's favorite cat and mouse team, 'Worker and Parasite'!”

Simpsons Quotes

2,356,315 views • 2 years ago

Four out of five Simpson, impressive. But you missed your last target.

Four out of five Simpson, impressive. But you missed your last target.

🎄 Simpsons Quotes 🎅

801,227 views • 1 year ago

"We'd have to raise taxes."

"We'd have to raise taxes."

Simpsons Quotes

1,620,096 views • 3 years ago

"Bartdoyouwantsomebrowniebeforeyougotobed?!"

"Bartdoyouwantsomebrowniebeforeyougotobed?!"

Simpsons Quotes

1,473,447 views • 3 years ago

Bart, can we stop for ice cream?

Bart, can we stop for ice cream?

Simpsons Quotes

651,639 views • 1 year ago

You give me fever, when you touch me. Fever when you hold me tight.

You give me fever, when you touch me. Fever when you hold me tight.

Simpsons Quotes

653,241 views • 1 year ago

"Guess who likes you?"

"Guess who likes you?"

Simpsons Quotes

1,059,853 views • 3 years ago

🎶Simpson, Homer Simpson, he's the greatest guy in history. From the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree.🎶

🎶Simpson, Homer Simpson, he's the greatest guy in history. From the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree.🎶

Simpsons Quotes

570,272 views • 1 year ago

All right Homer, you can have the dental plan, on one condition. You must resign as head of the union.

All right Homer, you can have the dental plan, on one condition. You must resign as head of the union.

Simpsons Quotes

529,561 views • 1 year ago

"This place Moe's you left just before the accident. This is a business of some kind?"

"This place Moe's you left just before the accident. This is a business of some kind?"

Simpsons Quotes

931,540 views • 3 years ago

"Homer? Who is Homer? My name is Guy Incognito."

"Homer? Who is Homer? My name is Guy Incognito."

Simpsons Quotes

972,006 views • 3 years ago

It's my first day.

It's my first day.

Simpsons Quotes

358,226 views • 1 year ago

"Mom, I know your intentions are good..."

"Mom, I know your intentions are good..."

Simpsons Quotes

865,014 views • 3 years ago

Give me full power.

Give me full power.

Simpsons Quotes

496,713 views • 1 year ago

"Could you explain your model young man?"

"Could you explain your model young man?"

Simpsons Quotes

865,546 views • 3 years ago