👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆
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Nicki Glaser: I can't get off without watching porn. Joe Rogan: You can't get off at all without watching porn? Nicki Glaser: Not even close. I wouldn't even try. If my internet was down we had a power outage the other day at my house and it was just like, "Okay, well, I would be screwed without I couldn't do it. I mean, I would figure out a way. I think I would manage. but if my if my toys aren't working and aren't plugged in, and if I don't have porn, I'm just not getting off. I've never been someone who can do it manually and, and with my imagination. It's really a problem, because the porn I watch is like, not good. Joe Rogan: What kind? Nicki Glaser: Joe... Joe, Joe, Joe. Joe Rogan: Nicki, Nicki, Nicki. Nicki Glaser: Um, dude, it's bad. I mean, I got a threat on like, a DM from just some fucking troll a while back that was like, If I put out a hit on the dark web for you to be gang-raped and asked paid the guys $100,000 to do it I can make that happen and you know someone would accept that." And I was like "Jokes on you, that's my fantasy." Now, I mean I was... I don't really mean that. Please do not do that. Joe Rogan: (Chuckles) Nicki Glaser: But I was also like, no, that's I'm not joking, like, that's tends to be the stuff that I watch is like really aggressive, gangbangs, and like women tied up. I pay for my porn because I feel so bad what's happening to the women in it. I hope that they are being compensated for it. So I pay, like, 30 bucks a month for I'm watching really fucked up stuff. Um, and I've always been to. been into like being tied up and like I I'm someone who doesn't feel like I deserve pleasure without, like, having pain.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆7,554,858 次观看 • 1 个月前
Caller: My boss passed away. and left me $1,250,000 in his will. Dave Ramsey: Your boss left you $1.25 million?! Caller: Yes. I was his personal assistant for eight years. Dave Ramsey: That's one of the most unusual stories I've ever heard. Did he not have a family? Caller: He did. His wife actually called me to tell me I was included in the will. Dave Ramsey: Wow. How did you earn that kind of trust? Caller: I helped manage his properties, travelled with him and his family, and he even treated my kids like family. He was an incredible man. Dave Ramsey: Oh my God.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆2,815,434 次观看 • 24 天前
Dave Portnoy: I saw Tommy Fury box. He's not a real boxer. Joe Rogan: He's definitely a boxer. Dave Portnoy: He wears boxing gloves, sure. But if his last name wasn't Fury, nobody would know who Tommy Fury is. Joe Rogan: Maybe not, but he's still a legitimate professional boxer. Dave Portnoy: I think Jake Paul beats Tommy Fury. Joe Rogan: Look at this guy. Look at those combinations. You're out of your mind if you don't think he's a real boxer. Dave Portnoy: No. Joe Rogan: Dude, you're being a hater. He may not be Canelo or Bivol, but he's 100% a legitimate professional boxer. Dave Portnoy: I'd love to see the combined record of everyone Tommy Fury has fought. Joe Rogan: Guys get injured all the time. Fights get canceled and rescheduled. That's boxing. Dave Portnoy: I hope they fight because I'd put my entire net worth on Jake Paul. Joe Rogan: What if Tommy Fury outboxes him? Dave Portnoy: He won't. Joe Rogan: You don't know that. Dave Portnoy: I don't.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆1,189,565 次观看 • 27 天前
Idris Elba: "Who's the GOAT action star?" John Cena: "My heart says Jackie Chan. But if we're talking GOAT. Arnold Schwarzenegger." Idris Elba: "No. I love Arnold, but he isn't the GOAT." John Cena: "I know he's watching too." Idris Elba: "For me, it's Tom Cruise. He does the action himself. That's what makes him the GOAT." John Cena: "Arnold built the greatest action-star persona with just one iconic line per movie. Tom Cruise hangs off space shuttles, but Arnold could steal a movie with a single sentence." Idris Elba: "So, is Arnold the GOAT? Yes or no?" John Cena: "He's my GOAT. But my heart will always say Jackie Chan."
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆1,064,190 次观看 • 25 天前
Bill Maher: You're right about almost everything. I mean, "Let's have more babies and raise them on Mars" I don't get that, but okay. Elon Musk: I think we should be cautious about civilization's decline. We have plummeting birth rates in most places. Bill Maher: Right. And we also have plummeting resources. Elon Musk: No, no. Resources will be fine. Bill Maher: But they're not fine. They're not fine now. Elon Musk: Look, I'm not suggesting complacency. We do need to move to a sustainable energy economy as quickly as possible. But we're not in any danger of resource collapse. Bill Maher: But lots of people don't have enough food or water. Elon Musk: Water? We're not going to run out of water. People say we're running out of sand. Bill Maher: You can't drink the ocean. Elon Musk: But desalination is absurdly cheap. Bill Maher: Then why don't we do it? Elon Musk: We do. It is being done. There's already a lot of desalination. There's plenty of water. This is not an issue. I want to be clear about that.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆1,148,484 次观看 • 28 天前
Judge Monroe: Miss Taylor, you are seeking half of a lottery winning in the amount of $20 million, is that correct? Diana Taylor: Yes, correct. Judge Monroe: Okay. Explain to me why you are entitled to half of the winnings. Diana Taylor: So, I'm seeking this money because I strongly believe it still goes under marital property. Since, um, he got this ticket using our shared account, and then, uh, that he got it before our divorce papers were finalized. I supported this man for 7 years, following him everywhere he goes so he can, um, chase his dreams. And I give up on my career and and my life to support him. So, I think, um, yeah, again, I'm here to seek a fair distribution. I'm not here for greediness. Judge Monroe: And ur saying he purchase the ticket prior to when was your divorce finalized? Diana Taylor: Uh, it was on October 7, on, um, 9:00 AM. At 9:00 AM, I believe. Judge Monroe: Okay. All right. Thank you, Miss Taylor. Mr. Taylor? Mark Taylor: Thank you, Your Honor. Well, one thing is true, we were divorced on October 7th. That is the one true thing that she has communicated to you. Um, the full truth is that we got divorced that morning, and then, as you can see from the receipt, later that day after I had lunch with my attorney, I left his office from the finalized divorce, and I stopped on my way home to pick up some beer. I bought a six-pack, I was going to go home, watch the game, just kind of relax a little bit. And on a whim, as I was paying, I decided to buy a lottery ticket. And so, I bought a lottery ticket, something I almost never do. And that's when I won the money So, it was clearly after the divorce, she has no claim on that money, and this is really a waste of all of our time.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆1,762,068 次观看 • 1 个月前
Stephen Curry: Which basketball player did you have the most fun playing against, or loved beating the most? Michael Jordan: Danny Ainge. Stephen Curry: He's my new favourite. Michael Jordan: He talked so much trash. Stephen Curry: Imagine dealing with that on the court. I had to deal with it too. Michael Jordan: I'll stick to dealing with him on the golf course. Michael Jordan: What's your favourite thing about the Ryder Cup? Stephen Curry: The camaraderie, the patriotism, and representing your country. Everyone is playing to bring that trophy home. Michael Jordan: That's what makes it special. It's never been about the money it's about pride. The best team wins, and I've got a good feeling about this year. Stephen Curry: Next time we play, I'll bring my wallet. Michael Jordan: Come down to The Grove. I've got something waiting for you.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆661,827 次观看 • 23 天前
Gary Owen: I watched Shaq pick my wife up one day, and she refused to get in the truck because his friend was sitting in the front seat. She basically said, "You're not going to treat me like one of your girls. If I'm going to this meeting, I'm sitting in the front." Gary Owen: Your friend ended up getting out, slamming the door, and moving to the back seat. Shaquille O'Neal: She never held her tongue. Not once. Gary Owen: Trust me, I know! I even tried asking for a divorce once, and she just said, "No, we're not getting divorced." I was like, "Alright... I guess I'm staying." (Both laugh.) Shaquille O'Neal: Did you see what the Miami Heat did with Erik Spoelstra? Gary Owen: No. Shaquille O'Neal: His divorce was finalized, and just a few days later, they made him one of the highest-paid coaches in the NBA. Gary Owen: That's hilarious. If that was intentional, that's one of the greatest chess moves ever.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆815,906 次观看 • 1 个月前
4:47
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I recorded my wife cheating on me. and I've watched the video at least 10 times a day ever since. I wasn't looking for evidence, I was actually coming home early to surprise her with a kid-free date night Instead, I walked into my house, heard another man's voice, quietly pulled out my phone, and recorded everything. I never confronted them, When they went upstairs, I found the man's wallet, took photos of his driver's license, and quietly left, I sat in my car crying before watching the video to make sure it had saved. Then I went back inside, pretended I had just arrived home, and acted like I knew nothing. My wife poured us both a glass of wine while the other man quietly slipped out through the basement. She still has no idea I know, Since that day, every time I feel broken, I replay the video. I don't know why I keep doing it, I just can't seem to stop. What should I do?
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆396,542 次观看 • 20 天前
*UPDATE After overhearing my girlfriend compare me to her ex, I rejected her for 8 straight days with no explanation. A week later, she broke down in tears and asked why I didn't want her anymore. I finally showed her the post I had written about what I overheard. She admitted she never thought I was awake and said she exaggerated everything while talking to her friends. She claimed she enjoyed being with me, only occasionally faked it, and even admitted she sometimes did the same with her ex. She also said she lied about his size just to one-up her friends. I told her I had no reason to believe anything she was saying anymore. What hurt most wasn't the comparison it was that she'd rather embarrass me to her friends than talk to me about our relationship. She apologized, admitted getting drunk wasn't an excuse, and said she was too afraid of hurting my feelings to ever tell me what she wanted. She insisted the emotional connection with me was far stronger than anything she had with her ex. I asked if she still missed him. She admitted the physical side had been better, but said she'd choose me every time because of how loved and valued I made her feel. I'm still deeply hurt, and rebuilding that trust won't happen overnight. But after talking everything through, I decided I still love her and want to see if we can work through it together.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆220,942 次观看 • 14 天前
2:06
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I pretended to be asleep. then overheard my girlfriend of 3 years telling her friends her ex was better in bed than me. She admitted she sometimes faked it with me, she said her ex gave her the best spicy 🔥 she'd ever had. That she still missed it. I lay there five feet away, trying not to cry, When she got back into the bed, she smiled, said "I love you. I was planning to propose, Now I don't know if I can.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆248,747 次观看 • 17 天前
Caller: My 87-year-old father has always kept cash instead of using banks. He has over $500,000 in $100 bills that he earned through his business. When he passes, what's the best way to handle that much cash? Dave Ramsey: Talk to your bank now and ask for a private banker. Let them know what's coming and ask how they would process such a large cash deposit. Cash deposits over $10,000 are reported to the federal government, but that's normal and not something to worry about if the money was earned legally. Would your dad let you start depositing the money now? Caller: No, absolutely not. Dave Ramsey: Then I'd also ask him if he has cash hidden anywhere else. The $500,000 you know about may not be all of it, so having a trail could make settling his estate much easier.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆487,535 次观看 • 1 个月前
Chris Van Vliet: Do you have the same disdain for Peter Dinklage that Hornswoggle does? Brad Williams: Yes, absolutely. That's one thing Hornswoggle and I completely agree on. We'll unite over our mutual disdain for Peter Dinklage. Chris Van Vliet: So it's just jealousy? Brad Williams: Partly, yeah. He's incredibly talented. If they ever made The Brad Williams Story, Peter Dinklage would probably be cast to play me. Brad Williams: But my real issue is what happened with the live-action Snow White. Dinklage criticized the idea of using dwarf actors, arguing it was offensive. From my perspective, that meant taking away acting opportunities from little people. Brad Williams: I also know he asked the Saturday Night Live writers not to make dwarf jokes, which is his choice, and I respect that. But I think it's inconsistent because he appeared in Tiptoes, which I consider one of the most offensive movies about little people ever made. Brad Williams: The cast included Matthew McConaughey, Kate Beckinsale, Patricia Arquette, Peter Dinklage and Gary Oldman, who played a dwarf. Brad Williams: They didn't use CGI. They had Gary Oldman act on his knees with special wardrobe to make him appear shorter. In my opinion, it's one of the most offensive portrayals of little people ever put on screen.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆370,963 次观看 • 1 个月前
Chris: I was divorced last year. And my ex-wife, fought me for the house. I signed a quitclaim deed over to her. And, uh, this year she's decided to remarry a very wealthy person, and she moved into his home. And she just flatly told me that I am no longer paying for the mortgage, which, I mean, I really I'm beside myself. I don't know what to do because, I was working your plan pretty aggressively, and I was almost out, and now this. I don't know what my rights are. I don't know how to fight it. I don't know how to work it out. Uh, there's some variables that she introduced into this situation that are, they just make it even a harder situation. she did a remodification on the loan, uh, putting $30,000 on the back end of it. And it's just all the equity is gone, and it's $140,000 that, I guess I'm on the on the bill for here. With hey you know, I have a condo here that I'm paying rent on. I just don't know what to do sir. I was hoping for your guidance. Dave Ramsey: you got bad advice from your divorce attorney telling you to quitclaim the deed without requiring her to refinance. And, um, she wasn't required to refinance in the divorce decree, correct? Chris: No, she was. Uh, the timeline on that Dave Ramsey: Oh, she was! Then she's in contempt of court! Chris: she kept asking for extra time. Yes, she is. My divorce attorney said as much, but I don't know what that means and I don't know what, what Dave Ramsey: Well, that means you drag her into court and let the judge smack her around and tell her new husband to pay his house off. Chris: Oh, okay. Dave Ramsey: And we're going to make her life freaking miserable.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆362,015 次观看 • 1 个月前
Caller (Sarah): My husband 31 and I 21, and our household income is about $235,000. My parents set up a 529 college savings plan for me, which paid for most of my undergraduate and graduate education. I still have about $35,000 in federal student loans, but recently my parents asked me to repay them $114,000 the full value of the 529 plan. Jade Warshaw: What?! George Kamel: Wait... is that what they contributed, or the account balance? Sarah: That's the account balance. George Kamel: So they want you to repay not only what they contributed, but all of the investment growth too? Jade Warshaw: Was that ever the agreement? Sarah: I don't remember it that way, but my dad is a lawyer. Before I went to college, he had me sign a promissory note. Jade Warshaw: Oh no... George Kamel: Have you read it as an adult? Sarah: Yes. It says I promise to repay my parents for all sums paid toward my education, including tuition, housing, and living expenses. Jade Warshaw: Does it mention interest? George Kamel: It says "all sums paid," which is an interesting choice of words. Sarah: I didn't really understand what I was signing at the time. George Kamel: Let him take you to court. That would be one way to end a father-daughter relationship.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆239,848 次观看 • 1 个月前
Caller: My wife and I just entered Baby Step 7. We're completely debt-free, our house is paid off, and our net worth is just over $1,000,000. The problem is. I feel like I'm working for nothing now. By retirement, we'll probably have several million dollars. Writing checks to charity doesn't satisfy me. Leaving a fortune to my kids doesn't feel right either. Spending money doesn't make me happy. I don't know what I'm working toward anymore. Dave Ramsey: So you've discovered that money isn't the answer to happiness. Caller: Yeah.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆93,460 次观看 • 16 天前
Quentin Tarantino on the first season of Homeland: “That final episode, he’s got the suicide vest on. You don’t want him to die, but you’re kind of rooting for him. Then his daughter calls and says ‘Dad, tell me you’re coming home tonight. It’s one of the most emotional scenes I’ve ever seen in TV or film. That was a movie. That wasn’t a soap opera.” Tarantino’s point: Great TV needs to drop the mic at the end of the season not just endless “dot dot dot.”
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆147,500 次观看 • 28 天前
Host: Am I the asshole for not wanting to give my late husband's frozen sperm to his parents? My husband and I froze his sperm after he was diagnosed with cancer so we could still have children together if chemotherapy left him infertile. Sadly, the treatment didn't work, and he passed away on July 19. His parents knew we had frozen his sperm because they were heavily involved throughout his treatment. After he died, they asked if I still planned to use it. I told them no. Then they asked if I would transfer ownership of the sperm to them so they could have grandchildren instead. I assume they're planning to use a surrogate, but I was so shocked that I didn't even ask. My immediate reaction was that it felt wrong. We froze his sperm because we wanted to build a family together—not so his parents could continue his bloodline after he was gone. I'm also confused about the logistics. They're both in their 60s. Who exactly is supposed to raise this child? The surrogate? Another family member? My husband didn't have any siblings, and I certainly wouldn't feel comfortable doing it myself. To me, it feels like they're focused on continuing the family bloodline without really thinking through what's best for the child or what my husband would have wanted.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆133,654 次观看 • 1 个月前
Caller: This time last year, my wife asked me for an open relationship. I could tell she had been struggling for a long time, and I didn't want to immediately shut her down. So I told her, "I'll give you a month. Don't do anything physical. Take the time to gather information, and then come back and explain why you think this would help our marriage." Dr. John Delony: She was already involved with somebody, wasn't she? Caller: She was. She'd actually been involved with someone for about a year before she even asked me. She already had a plan. We set a bunch of ground rules if we were ever going to try an open relationship, but she was with someone almost immediately and it was someone different from the first person. Both of them were coworkers. After that first month, I realized this wasn't something I wanted any part of. Honestly, I think I knew that before I ever agreed to it. I asked her to stop, and she said, "No." She also told me she wasn't sleeping with anyone else, but she was still sleeping with me. Later, I found out she wasn't using protection with these other people. Dr. John Delony: Have you ever heard the story about the rattlesnake in the paper bag? Caller: I think so, but you'll have to remind me. Dr. John Delony: A man finds a paper bag with a rattlesnake trapped inside. The snake says, "Help me out. I'm stuck. The man says, I'm not reaching in there. You're a rattlesnake you'll bite me." The snake replies, "No, I won't. I just need your help. Eventually, the man believes him, reaches into the bag, and the snake bites him. The man says, "Why did you bite me? You promised you wouldn't." The snake replies, "I'm a rattlesnake. That's what I do Then the snake asks again, "Please help me out of the bag. The man says, "No, you just bit me." The snake says, "I know, but I got it out of my system. I won't do it again." The man believes him, reaches back into the bag and the snake bites him again. Dr. John Delony: That's you.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆131,885 次观看 • 1 个月前
Will Ferrell “translating” Marcello Hernández at the ESPYs is comedy gold 😂 Marcello starts speaking Spanish normally… Will Ferrell: “Hey everybody! What’s up gang? I’m excited to be here at Madison Square Garden!” Then it gets even more unhinged. Will: “As a young boy in Miami, I didn’t have many friends. most of them were stray dogs named George, Peaches, and Alexander. Marcello: “I didn’t even say that!” Pure chaos.
👑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆107,748 次观看 • 29 天前