Ended twitter dating discourse

Pandering where. He described the economic realities for black women back in the day & why they’ve had to navigate dating the way they do. You just don’t like it cause it forces you to unpack your misogynoir and the expectations you have of black women in relationships.

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And let it be known that black capitalism is NOT the solution

Okay I wanna break this down further too so hold on and walk with me if you can 😭 no one talks about it but dating while black means navigating many potential matches that were visibly impacted by mass incarceration, the crack epidemic of the 80s that wrecked the people who raised them, redlining that kept them poor and disadvantaged, etc This is delicate and tricky to explain in an online replies section but basically it makes the dating pool even harder for black folks. Everyone of course wants to try their best to marry someone equally yoked or better, but when the community has been sooo wrecked, it makes the search harder. Poor, under-educated dating candidates with criminal histories, shaky family dynamics that would limit the ability to build generational wealth with them, and maybe even more children than they really can keep up with exists in EVERY race’s dating pool — but man it kills me when I KNOW it has to do with the brutal history of racism hitting their family hard and that someone would probably be an amazing candidate otherwise if mass incarceration, redlining, etc didn’t poison their well. Then you have this thing that happens where entire class divides develop based on who got hit harder vs. who got hit, but not as bad. Single black folks hoping to marry understandably try and overlook marrying into impoverished family lineages, dating people with extensive criminal records, people who don’t have strong enough work skillsets or college degrees to break the curse for the future families they might create. ESPECIALLY if you’re from the generation that’s a little older and you’re 30s, 40s, 50s trying to find love. The older you are, the deeper in history your potential matches go and the more likely they are to have been deeply impacted. It’s deep, I could write a whole book on it, and I can literally scroll through a black dating app right now and at a glance know which men / women this likely applies to if I were to swipe through.

Exactly my brother illusion of inclusion created a huge void in black society and we are now reaping the by product of all those years of them tryna break the black family

Start blaming policies that affect both of us

Everything white ppl fault huh 🤔 🤦🏽‍♀️

….😕

We all just need to give each other a little grace

Black women are brainwashed to be afraid of the black men in they own family

You could be speaking from an experience personal to you but i’m a black man & I grew up afraid of some men in my family. For many women I know it’s not “brainwashing”. Many are reacting to the sexual, domestic violence that they witnessed the women in their family go through.