Good question, would love to hear different perspectives.

I agree with her especially when family or friends come to social media platforms asking for “support” via go fund me and cash apps. Expecting extreme levels of privacy while coming to social media & wanting public support is something I don’t get.

Because at the end of the day them telling you does what? Absolutely nothing. Unless for awareness purposes it’s really just you being nosy

I think it’s for most a genuine question. The brain is trying to come to terms w/ the fact that a person is dead and knowing how or what happened helps people to move forward with grieving and coming to terms with the loss/death of someone. Timing of when u ask is important tho!

People ask ‘how did they die’ because it’s human nature to understand risk and make sense of loss. That question only became taboo after HIV/AIDS, when death was moralized and stigmatized. Shame didn’t come from curiosity. It came from judgment

For many people it helps them make sense of the loss especially if it was a sudden or unexpected death.

It’s a privacy thing. Because the truth of the matter is, people don’t wanna know because they care, they wanna know because they wanna be nosey and wanna run their mouths and tell other people

I believe people, (definitely me) if the person who died is around the same age, the fear of your own mortality wants to know how the person passed. It turns into ‘should I get checked or should I change something’ … not just being nosy… but it could just be me 🤷🏽‍♂️

If it aint on the news, newspaper, or fam group chat for YOU to see. mind yo fuckin business.

I think because when you just find out,you want the focus to be on the fact they gone,not folks talking about the why and asking questions.

I don’t understand why folks get mad when ppl ask how someone passed after you posted it on social media. The announcement was to the public. Your page was not private. Also, there are other ways to make announcement of your loved one’s passing w/o going to social media.

I learned that people started getting tight lipped about it in the case of public figure overdoses. Then with SM booming, everyone kinda adopted that conservative approach. Before, people only really hid HIV/AIDS related deaths of closeted men, we discussed everything else freely

I’m not gone hold y’all, if I’m unwilling to state the why to someone’s death then I’m just not gonna announce that. My friends and family knowing would be enough.

ngl yall in the comments going hard, and ima STILL wanna know the cause of death like ..?

depends where its coming from. can sound insensitive like you care more about the drama than what their loved ones are going through. anyone would be curious, but the focus should be on comforting those who are grieving

I mean it’s just rude tbh. People are sad, got hella decisions to make, a lot of pressure and just trying to get through a tough time. Why would they want to talk about the cause?

You look way to old to not have any couth or understand WHY we shouldnt ask that.

I think sometimes it’s about the reality of it. However, when HIV/AIDS hit the scene I think is when people really got quiet about the reason. Imo, it’s ultimately have to do with appearance/status as the cause of death may suggest living a bad life. Not wanting to be judged.

My mama passed last July. Her best friend from high school DM’d my little brother asking how she passed. He didn’t tell her and told him if she asks again not to say anything. Mind you, they spoken in YEARS. The reason is simple: people like to gossip & I don’t play about my mama.

Because our people unfortunately don’t support prevention or awareness. So it’s like, yea, they could tell us how they died and possible save a life, encourage someone to get tested, or seek treatment. But for whatever reason they won’t. They’d rather feed the conspiracy.

I understand and agree. Folks will solicit sympathy, prayers and even money but god-forbid you ask for details around the untimely death. It’s weird.

From a historical lens, it’s because some deaths point out genetic weaknesses in bloodlines, which historically has been one of the main factors considered when accepting proposals or arranging marriages.

Do what I do and Google their name. 9 times out of 10, the cause of death is reported somewhere online..Especially if the person is young..🤷🏾‍♀️

If you’re asking in a comment section is asking people to just blurt out shit that should be dealt with respectfully. Calling someone directly is respectful as you can be. People can tell if you trying to be nosy.

I think it’s the timing but trust i be wanting to know too i don’t think I’ve ever asked anyone i always found out eventually lol but yall tell us all your other business but it’s tight lipped about a death

Probably to protect the mourning from the gossip of it all and people already know what they people dying of and still won’t change say children of deceased who know their parents die from something and know they on track for the same but continue to take no action anyway .

they actually used to always include it in old obituaries how the person died. usually obituaries were very shot and explained the age, exactly how/what killed them then their immediate loved ones.

Um how would someone's cause of death affect you? Would you cry more or less, would you care more or less, would you give more or less. That information is on a need to know basics, it obvious you didn't need to know. NEXT

Not so much disrespectful, but sometimes it’s a sensitive topic. I had a friend died of AIDS but his family told people he died of cancer because AIDS is stigmatized and they are religious people. A lot of people find certain causes of death shameful.

Fuck all that! What is she doing with that tie!?

Cause it’s not your business, that’s somebody loved ones. It’s insensitive

People ask how someone passed because curiosity is human—and grief isn’t one-size-fits-all. Public posts can invite questions. The key is how we ask: with compassion, not entitlement. If it’s shared, be gentle; if not, respect boundaries.