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I hate saying this, and I hate having to put myself out there like this even more, but fuck you. Fuck the state, fuck the cops, FUCK YOU
30,423 views • 10 days ago •via X (Twitter)
103 Comments

- you're right, women should arm themselves and make sure to train up regularly. - any "man" who hits a woman is no man. thank God you had the courage to leave - im sorry to hear about the police. i wish there was something that i could do more than "thoughts and prayers", but im clueless otherwise. - i understand the homeless thing, my aunt was homeless for many years before finally getting on section 8. - in the end, i would rather be judged by a jury of 12 than carried by 8. Im so sorry you're going through this.

Of course I left. That won’t be me. I am not the one

It takes a lot of bravery and courage to come forward to share your struggles. I feel like I know you from our everyday posts. I see your strength and I know for a fact that your circumstances are temporary. I submit for your consideration this link of jobs that also include housing and in some instances, food:

I feel like I’ll regret sharing all this, but fuck it. If it helps even one younger woman it was worth it. I’m just not the kind of person to put my face on the internet, but some things are worth it

I'm so sorry that you're going through all this. For what it's worth, I will always try to support you in any way I can no matter what. Please stay safe and take care 💙

I know you will, and I couldn’t ask for a better friend. You’ve always been amazing, and are one of my favourite people for a reason. I just got so frustrated that I could be quiet anymore, and that’s never been a strong suit of mine💜🫶

Oh my God Marie I am SO sorry you’re going through all this. I had no idea. My blood is absolutely BOILING. Please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need to talk. In the last five years, when my IRL friends and family can’t (or won’t) help, the friends I’ve made here on 𝕏 have been my rock. They’ve become like family to me, and I don’t mean that metaphorically either. I’m talkin’ ride or fucking die brothers and sisters who won’t hesitate to go to war for me in real life if I asked.

I am extremely private, to a fault some would say, but some things need saying. I’m just appalled at the cops, the legal system, all of it. I completely understand now why some women don’t report crap, and I can’t even imagine how hard it must be for younger women to have to deal with this. It’s you guys who have kept me sane through so much. You really have no idea 🫶🫶

Absolutely 💥❤️🫂 The legal system for victims of DV is a fucking joke; for both women AND men. I know this from personal experience as well, and I don’t talk about it for the exact reasons you spoke of.

It’s hard to talk about, especially for those of us who are private like this

To be fair: I’m not exactly ‘private’ about the searing hatred and utter disdain I have for my son’s mother…😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣

I can seem very open in discussing some things, but anything serious? I hate burdening others and keep the important shit to myself.

EXACTLY. I’m the same way.💥

That is an incredibly stressful and unfair trap to be stuck in. My sympathies. Since he fled and you can’t get his address, ask the court clerk for an 'Alternative Service' motion. This lets the court serve him via email instead. has free DV legal help.

I didn’t realise that was even an option, and had spoken to legal aid and they didn’t mention it. Thank you so much, and I will definitely look into it🙏💜

I am so glad this gives you a real path forward! When you contact the court clerk or an advocate, just tell them: 'The respondent fled, I have no way to get his address, and I need to file a motion for alternative service via email.' You've got this, and I'm cheering you on! 💜🙏

Thanks. I may have an email address for him somewhere, so it’s more than the courts have done. Why is it my job, as a private citizen, to track someone down? Could I? Quite possibly, but it wouldn’t be legally

🙏You're 100% right to be furious. It’s a broken system. If you know where his family lives, give those addresses to the clerk with the Alternative Service motion too. The court can legally mail the papers to them or hand them over directly. Hang in there. Please keep us updated.

I have an address, but he’s not there and he wouldn’t go there , and they won’t serve it unless he is

That makes sense. So frustrating. Filing for Alternative Service and getting it sent to email or social media is the way if possible. 🙏

I am sorry to hear you are going through tough times, friend. Please stay safe.

I am trying, and thanks. This is the most awkward thing I’ve ever done, but if it helps even one other woman, then it’s worth it as far as I am concerned

I am totally in agreement with you. And shelters are not always the safest either. When I used to read electric and gas meters where I live the local woman’s shelter ‘My Sisters House’ was labeled on the account. It had been labeled that way for years. I reported it to the director of the shelter and she went as white as a ghost.

Shelters are awful and I hate that’s it’s been what I’m forced to deal with. I’m in such a rough area that it makes it worse. What I hate more is imagining the shit younger women must go through

I know. You stay safe and protect yourself.

I rarely watch a video, but this morning I was drawn to watch yours. I am sorry you are dealing with this. I've been there. As someone pointed out, you can still get a restraining order if they are evading being served. A piece of paper does nothing, as you noted. However, if there is another incident, it provides legal course for conviction. I don't know what state you live in. There are many people, cops included, who want to help. I'm sorry you got some bad ones. Don't let it jade you. I am praying for you this morning.

I am in NC, and if they can’t serve him, they’ll drop it. They’ve said I can apply again if he turns back up. I don’t understand why I, as the private citizen, am expected to provide his address

They need the address to serve him.

But again, why is it up to me, as a private citizen, to provide the address, when they know guys will hide?

It took a lot of courage to do this knowing that you cherish your privacy. You searched your soul and you knew this had to be said. The people we are supposed to rely on to protect us have failed you, protect yourself. I'll help you as best as I can, dear friend.

Yeah, this was really hard to do, but I felt I kinda had to. I am very private about so much, my face included, but I had to vent, maybe help some younger women see they aren’t alone out there. You guys on here have been my saving grace, in so many ways 🫶💜

I'm honored to be one of your loyal followers and friends.

It is I who am honored💜💜

Hug received, luv. 🫶

Oh no, be safe! I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Women are incredibly vulnerable and something like this is scary. Being proactive and cautious is your only recourse. 🫂

We wouldn’t be so vulnerable if the burden didn’t always fall on us. Why do I have to provide an address for him to be served? Why do I have to have the resources to track him down? That makes no sense to me

The burden does seem to always fall upon us. In many of these types of circumstances. On top of it the lack of empathy and concern or care is clear.

I’ve never been someone to lean into gender crap, but this has been beyond me infuriating. There is no empathy. There is no concern. We are bottom dwellers to the police and they treat us as they see us

I don’t like feeding that type of narrative but, in this case it’s really true! It’s a culture of doubt and condescension. Not all but many. It’s usually a reflection of their own behavior and beliefs.

I don’t either, but when you’re in this position, especially when you’ve done nothing to bring it on yourself, it’s beyond frustrating

I don’t know the particulars but you should look up other support systems to ensure you’re safe please 🙏🏻

There aren’t any. The other only DV shelter in the area has been full for a month. There nothing. I can’t imagine what young women in this situation have to go through in small towns. That’s actually pisses me off more than what happened to me. That there is nothing for them. Absolutely nothing

Get a firearm, learn to be safe and learn to shoot.

About where I’m at

Oh man. That just sucks. So sorry you are dealing with that. Praying for you. 🙏🙏🙏🙏

That’s life, I just hate imaging how younger women feel, what they have to go through. It makes me so mad. I can handle this, but they aren’t equipped, you know?

Purchase a firearm. Take a couple lessons and practice at the range. Carry pepper gel spray. Only pull the gun if your life is threatened and you are willing to kill him. Praying for you 🙏🏻

Thank you. I am hoping it never comes to it. It’s just a very helpless feeling

❤️🙏🏻

❤️🙏

This has been the biggest FY moment of my life yet, but if it helps even one other young woman, then I’m ok with it

Only advice, learn as much about your weapon as possible and practice at the range.

I’ve always done that anyways, I have just been so angry at what young women must have to go through. You never think it’ll be you until it is, you know?

😳 - this breaks my heart. One of my absolute favorite people, on here. 💔 I’ve said it for a long time and it’s still true, you really never know what others are dealing with. FUQ EVERYBODY THAT DID NOT HELP YOU!! Genuinely hope things get better, soon. 💞

I’ve had great friends on here, like you, which is what I needed most. I just hope it helps someone else feel less alone, lets them know others share their frustrations with the system 🫶💜

WELL SAID!!! I hope the exact same thing! 💞

Hang in there, hope you find something that works better for RA

Thank you. I should be able to start an injectable soon, which means maybe I can get back to work and be out of this situation, which is what I want most. It’s hard losing so much ability to care for myself when I’ve been fiercely independent my whole life, probably to a fault tbh

This breaks my heart to watch…. to see someone I follow daily have to endure this. You’ve given me so many laughs and made me smile so many times when I was down….and all the while, I had no idea. Please let me me know what I can do right now - like NOW, to help you. DM me. Please. I owe you.

It’s why I joke about everything and just try to have a laugh. Makes it all a little better, and if I can make someone else smile who may be going through it, too, then it makes me smile as well

I'm sorry you are going through that 😞

So sorry

That’s life but it’s not always easy. If this helps even another woman feel less alone, especially younger ladies, then it’s worth it saying something as far as I’m concerned

🤗🤗🤗 I wish you a lot of strength. Yeah, the Belgian equivalent of restraining orders (if we even have them) also don't work in the case of man-stalking-woman. You mostly have to do something wrong first, before the courts can do anything. (exception for conspiring terrorism)

The burden is entirely on us, and even when we have evidence galore, it’s up to us to also find them, while being unallowed to contact them. It’s beyond frustrating

I wish this were not happening to you. It's horrible. I'll be praying. This is insane.

It’ll be alright, just frustrating dealing with the system, seeing what other women have had to go through. I can handle it, but I feel terrible for younger women who may be going through this

Stay safe ♥️

I am doing my best, but lord knows the legal system doesn’t make it easy

🥺🙏🙏🙏🙏

🫶💜

Praying for you 🙏🙏🙏❤️

Thank you, my friend🫶💜

This is temporary, you are a strong woman, create a plan and work towards it every day, you will be victorious, have a mantra, self talk is a powerful tool, take baby steps and love yourself, be safe, reach out to a counselor. Praying for you.🙏🙏🙏🙏

A counsellor can’t help any more than the legal system. I’ll figure it out, but it’s frustrating af

Which is why I haven’t sought out a counsellor. Why tf would I pay the state any more money for web services when they’ve shown I am nothing to them?

That sounds awful and I'm so sorry for you. No one should experience something like that. As I see you life in America, unfortunately, I know nothing about the social system there, but couldn't you get a place in a women's shelter for some time? Best wishes + good luck 🫂

America is an amazing country, but it’s a few bad apples that fvck it up for everyone. I would always choose to live here over any other place, but let me know pretend it’s truly better anywhere else, especially not now

I’m so sorry you’re dealing with all this, Marie. ❤️💪

That’s life, just sucks sometimes. I expected more, but was only let down by my own expectations 💜

I’ll be praying for you 🙏🏼

Thank you. You guys are amazing, and have kept me sane. Given me somewhere to laugh and hang with amazing people

I'm really sorry to hear about that. Take care & stay strong 💪🙏

Thanks. It’s why we meme, right?💜

Be safe.

Doing my best, just remidnd the hard way that the police can’t do that. Only I can

Hi @__0HOUR1_ Can you give Marie any assistance locating the person that needs to be served, please?

@__0HOUR1_ It’s why he took off, and while I know what city he’s in for the moment, that’s about it, unfortunately

That makes me so angery Marie. Wish I was there, I would find him and fuck him up!!! I wouldn't abandon you, people have abondon me in the past so I feel your pain. And it's NOT being selfish taking care of and looking after yourself first eh! *hugs*

I can handle myself, and if he pops back up once it’s dropped, I’ll go back to the car if I have to. Just been a very frustrating experience. I had to vent, share and hopefully make someone else feel like they aren’t alone. Awkward putting my face online, but I had already been considering it for the past year

I'm aware you can handle yourself. I just don't like to hear a man punching/abusing a woman, wouldn't be the first time I beat a guy up for hitting a woman! You can vent to me anytime if you wish eh.🥰 I only use a PC for these kinds programs, so I don't do videos of myself.

PS. I realize it may be difficult for you to open up to people, it is for me! But you kind of have in the past with some of your replies. I fucking despise people who gossip and shit talk, hense why I don't tell people my personal stuff. But anything you tell me stays with me eh!

Was in a horribly abusive relationship many years ago. My then MIL called the cops on her own son, because it was that bad. Cops arrive, look at my neck, swollen and bruised from being choked, and said “doesn’t look that bad”, and basically did nothing.

That sounds about like what I would expect from the cops at this point, and I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I truly hope things are better for you now💜💜

Sorry to hear what you are going through at the moment, no one deserves to suffer through that. Do what you can to stay safe. Huggggg

You’re the best, and thank you. Just had to vent my frustration somewhere instead of keeping it all in, so this happened to be the place. I’m sure I’ll regret it somehow, but you all are better to me than anyone I know irl, and I love you guys for it

Don't regret this, safety and mental health is a very important thing, and reaching out is very good and gives you a good support if you need, specially if there's anyone near you that can help.

I just meant putting my face online here, but if it helps even one other person feel less alone in their own struggles, then it was worth it

It's a lot of people who understand what you are going through, more than you know. I wish I knew any place where you are but I don't know any outside of Ga. 🙏4 you

It’s all good. Probably just going back to stay in the car anyways, but thank you

I know a place in Georgia that's real nice in delonica that might be able to help you but I don't know if you can make it that far

I am so sorry you are having to deal with this krazyness. I am praying to God Almighty for your safety, strength and wisdom (and aim). Practice, practice, practice so when the need arrises you are confident in your ability to keep yourself safe! ❤️

Thank you, and I will. I’m pretty good with firearms of all kinds, but it’s always wise to stay proficient💜🫶
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