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I’m grateful everything I touch turns to gold. For example, I just got finished winning $22,000 in 15 minutes playing Blackjack. Even my bedsheets turned gold last night from “wrestling around” with my newly spray tanned 28 year-old sexy fitness competitor I met in the casino last night! Needless...

696,469 просмотров • 1 год назад •via X (Twitter)

Комментарии: 10

Фото профиля Not Darian DeVries
Not Darian DeVries1 год назад

The "fitness competitor" he's talking about is definitely a guy.

Фото профиля Aubrey Huff
Aubrey Huff1 год назад

I bet that was the first thought in your head was, “ I wish it was me that was the fitness competitor.”

Фото профиля mcfly
mcfly1 год назад

Hard to believe your wife left you…

Фото профиля Aubrey Huff
Aubrey Huff1 год назад

Yeah, can you imagine a single rich tall guy like myself who’s divorced & single actually having sex with hot women? I mean, that kind of happens when a guy like me decides not to fall into the trap of the institution of marriage that only benefits a woman. If you need help getting laid, let me know I can send you some of my old roster.

Фото профиля QBvision 💿
QBvision 💿1 год назад

U might be the worst thing to ever walk the earth

Фото профиля Aubrey Huff
Aubrey Huff1 год назад

I can taste your jealousy. How’s the 9 to 5 today? I’m currently soaking in the spa right now about to get a massage. I might even get a happy finish if I’m lucky.

Фото профиля Roger McDonald
Roger McDonald1 год назад

Yep shit that never happened for 1000 alex.

Фото профиля Aubrey Huff
Aubrey Huff1 год назад

How’s Loki doing? Do you have black widow posters all over your wall with semen stains all over them?

Фото профиля BoilerDZ
BoilerDZ1 год назад

You’re so ridiculously bitter.

Фото профиля Aubrey Huff
Aubrey Huff1 год назад

I didn’t die a hero. But I’ve finally lived long enough to become the villain. My bitterness died long ago when my distain for most humans birthed my obsession to become the best serial killer the world has ever seen.

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