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I've been doing fire performance for quite some time, but this summer has been absolutely crazy! ๐Ÿ”ฅ I'm managing the studio, working on performances almost every day, and creating shows not just for myself, but for the whole group. It's been intense, and honestly, it's been really difficult to...

13,973 Aufrufe โ€ข vor 1 Monat โ€ขvia X (Twitter)

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it's my birthday. sometimes I feel like I'm 10 years behind in life. deep down I know that that this year will be the best and hardest year of my life but I gotta be honest the five folks who care for a minute. spent the past decade depressed, embarrassed that I wasn't more talented or more successful, guilt ridden for not being mature enough to handle life the way I would've liked when I was younger, keeping my head down trying to work on myself and trying to hone my skills to be a better storyteller. just years of telling myself I'm not good enough, telling myself I'm not old enough or lucky enough. telling myself who the fuck cares about what I do or create. like how the fuck can I do what so many others do. fuck off for even thinking you can do it stephen. I'm not a special person, I'm just a dude. some idiot. who has been in the film industry since I was a kid. an industry I left for a while because I needed to disconnect, I needed time to figure out my life after working since the second grade. needed to find my love and passion. and I did. which is making things for people to enjoy. but it hasn't been that simple. that pivot was like a hard reset. suddenly everything I'd ever achieved meant nothing. it's been a constant grind every day while trying to keep a roof over my head taking on retail jobs, service jobs, handyman gigs after leading shows and movies. and that's okay. like I've gotten clowned on it but you gotta make it work. in between all of that I've been lucky to work with huge brands, do stellar uncredited work on amazing flicks and slowly chip away on my own goals. for the past decade I haven't been able to sleep easily. can't turn off my brain. thinking about how I'm never doing enough for hours just in bed. telling myself maybe it'll be different tomorrow while hiding from the world making unhealthy decisions, not taking care of myself. a lot of times I do feel like I've missed out on my life, especially the past ten years. I've just been working. when I'm not working I'm working on the side with nothing to show for it. just endless chasing rent while being delusional about creating a better life. if you're not careful this kinda dream can suck the life out of you. you lose your passion for it. but I haven't. so much of me has just been waiting in the background of my own life, thinking there would be some moment of realization when I've worked on myself enough and I suddenly I feel like "oh I've got this." waited for that moment but it never came. don't think it ever will. I'm tired of waiting, I'm tired of thinking I'm not ready, I'm tired of telling myself I'm not good enough. it's not true. I won't give up. I won't give up on trying to entertain people. I won't give up on my dream of helping my friends fulfill their own. I never will. love and appreciate all of you for sticking with me and watching what I do and being here for me. 90% of my body is made of movies, games and soundtracks; so because I'm a cringe dork, I have meme'd for years that I feel like reclusive bruce wayne in the dark knight rises (but broke and less handsome) afflicted by failures unable to accept that my life can go on. but that's bullshit. maybe I needed an era to change and hurt and struggle and learn and become who I wanted to be. life comes and goes in eras. and I'm in my begins era now baby.

Stephen Ford

30,135 Aufrufe โ€ข vor 1 Jahr

๐Ÿšซ๐–๐€๐‘๐๐ˆ๐๐†: ๐‹๐Ž๐๐† ๐€๐๐ƒ ๐’๐€๐๐๐˜ ๐๐Ž๐’๐“ ๐€๐‡๐„๐€๐ƒ๐Ÿšซ Hi Everyone I said I would post after debut but turns out I needed some extra time to recover (more tired than I thought) but now it's 2 days later so here we goโ€ฆ I wanted to start by saying THANK YOU ALL!โค๏ธ The support and love Iโ€™ve gotten from everyone, creators and viewers alike, has honestly been nothing short of mind-blowing and exceeds anything I could have ever dreamed of. There have been creators that I've looked up to for years, that have reached out in some way or another, and that experience is enough to make me want to curl up into a ball and violently cry๐Ÿ˜ญ I first started making videos around 2 years ago just for fun, and started streaming around 1.5 years ago, and to get this far has exceeded my whilst dreams. (For context I thought 1k subs in 5 years would have been INSANE) My whole life I've been on the straight and narrow, keeping things pretty safeโ€ฆ It was just how I was raised. But late last year, I did a lot of reflecting on what I really wanted to do in life, and what made me the happiest. This year I'm taking perhaps my first and biggest risk, and trying to do content full time. It's been rocky, chaotic and exhausting but I'm finally doing something I'm passionate about. And it's all thanks to you, thank you so muchโค๏ธ Everyone's kind words and support has been overwhelming, and the fact that it's enabled me to at least try full time content is extremely humbling and you have all made me the happiest mafia bull man alive. Thank you to the people who supported me along my journey, my friends, my mods, my community and my personal managers/editors. I would be nothing without you, so thank you for your undying support and belief in me. Thank you to the people who I worked with specifically for this debut, pouring your heart and soul into it to help bring everything to life, and bearing with me and my tweaks as we went! Thank you to the viewers, whether you are new, here from the start, or joined and left, from the smallest interaction to always being there, thank you! Thank you to the new friends Iโ€™ve met along the way as well, I will cherish these memories forever (Why does it sound like I'm dying๐Ÿ’€โ€ฆ LETS MAKE PLENTY MORE) From the bottom of my heartโค๏ธI love you all, Vain

Vain ๐Ÿ‚๐Ÿ’œ

27,907 Aufrufe โ€ข vor 2 Jahren

Since timezones and such... I'm gonna say it now HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! And now, here's a video and a wall of text... โฌ‡๏ธ Thanks to ALL OF YOU... It's been one of the best years in my life, not only I acomplished a lot of dreams, but also met wonderful people. I cannot believe how far I got, but that wouldn't have been possible without all your support... Went to Japan and even saw the snow for the first time in my life at the same time while visiting lot of MH places! I went to Gamescom and could both the MH directors and part of the community Went to Japan a SECOND time but invited for a Monster Hunter game, and got to met another MH director! I went from 2k followers to almost 7k followers, which for me, it's AMAZING and cannot thank you all enough, seriously Whenever I felt down, I just had to go an read all your replies, your DM's, the amount of love and laughs you all gave me cannot be quantified, you might underestimate my words but trust me, it helped me so much and I felt so close to a lot of the people The more I think of it, the more happy I am... Monster Hunter is a big part of my life and will always be! Hope you all can keep trusting me and my content, and I cannot imagine 2025 being better but sure hope so! I tried to put as much names on the video as I could, but there's a point one has to stop because otherwise I would end up with 20hours video haha If your name is not there, it's probably that reason alone There's also a possibility the auto-corrector rewrote some name wrong and I didn't notice it, sorry again! Thanks if you have read until here and even more, if you have watched the video. Thanks for everything, I'm almost crying just writting down this๐Ÿฅบ

Shincry

59,770 Aufrufe โ€ข vor 1 Jahr