lol they cooked!!!

The fork thing had fucked me up. I need to reevaluate my life today for real.

“if you’re not supposed to eat at night then why is there a light in the fridge?”

I must be a patient too then 😂

If I get out of the shower clean the how does the towel get dirty? 🤣😂🤣 This one got me…

“I ate some gummys and I have questions”…🤣🤣

The cargo vs shipping is perfect 😂

Why do we park in the driveway, but drive on the parkway? If firefighters fight fire, and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight?

Dammit 😂🤣

Not a lie told 😂😂

Not one

Why is it called a near miss when it's a near hit?

On thr baby pidgeon thing its probably because birds in general try to keep their offspring to the nest until theyre old enough to fly. If they dont fly and fall to their deaths theyre usually eaten by other animals including other birds. Pidgeons are the chiuahaha of birds.

😂 😂 I am dying “ why have I never seen a baby pigeon “

We park on driveways And Drive on parkways

Valid questions.

Lmfaoooooo

If something created zero to represent nothing, how is it then that something that came from nothing created something to represent nothing?

Never seen a baby pigeon fr🤣🤣🤣🤣

No so crazy now eh?

I have one... Why are asteroids called asteroids and hemorrhoids called hemorrhoids? Shouldn't be reversed!🤣

The idea of buying a USED MATTRESS off FaceBook Marketplace seems GROSS...! Yet, how many times do you crave sleeping in a 5 Star Hotel bed...!? Thousands of ALL KINDS of people that make sure they do EVERYTHING they can on said BED....!

🤣🤣🤣🤣

😂

Huh I don’t think I have ever seen a baby pigeon. They might be on to something haha

Let him cook!

You dont see baby pigeons because mother pigeons hide away their young in secretive nests until they are essentially full grown.

The eye movement and "ting" in the music was so perfect after the apartments comment 😭

Every single one of these is easily answered with logic my guys.

When you take a 200mg edible instead of a 20mg 🤣

Melt!

Well the towel collects the dead cells as you dry off Restaurant forks, if you every washed dishes at a restaurant then you know don’t trust not a single utensil, dish or cup

Early bird may get the worm, but 2nd mouse gets the cheese!

Because English is intentionally designed to be confusing… I legit challenge any linguist to disagree. English is an amalgamation of contradictions.

😂😂😂

🤣🤣🤣🤣The truth shall Set you free!