Watu wetu wa nyumbani get a rare dopamine rush from watching failed projects ya watu wanajua. So, if you have started a construction project along the highway, which automatically falls into the category of “volatile ambitions,” na ukipima vizuri, your financial future seems “shaky,” it's better ujenge indirectly through... a foreman or a proxy. Then kazi yako itakuwa kupitia hapo usiku na torch to inspect the progress after everyone has left the vicinity, to ensure maximum security. Bahati mbaya, “intel” leaks kwa “ground” ati hiyo “skeleton” of a four-story rental building umeamusha hapo Hawaii, on your way to Eltret, the city of champions and conmen, ni yako, my brother wewe umeisha! Weka alarm ya 3 am and talk to God directly before others wake up na wamsumbue with their prayer requests, aendelee kulinda your source of income, because one mistake and your rivers of fortune run dry, your goose is cooked. Watu waki notice vijana wa “koroga” wameacha kuzungusha cement na sand hapo nje, you will be frog-marched to a busy market full of judgmental eyes and stripped naked, na uvalishwe boxer yako ya samosa on head for all to see. Every morning, ile Matatu moja ya Box from kwenu upcountry itakuwa inapita karibu site, the “Conductor,” who has self appointed himself as the de-facto “Crusader,” will shout your failures “for free” to anyone who cares to listen. You’ll hear him yell to the driver, “Tyar brake kidogo, kuro pichu korikai po Chemnjor kisakwan!” (Driver, kindly slow down for these passengers to have a look at those rentals of Chemnjor that have stagnated.) He will then give strict instructions for everyone to open their windows, and for those sleeping to be woken up, so they can witness the spectacle of your ugly, ambitious eyesore that you hurriedly “created” to bridge the gap between the haves and the have-nots. It was meant to be a testament to the villagers that you could mix work and play, and serve as your flagship project to demonstrate that you are a serious contender in case you decide to run for MCA in a few years. But now it stands abandoned midway due to a lack of capital, war, and other barriers to entry into new markets. Confused passengers will gaze at your “ambitious ruins” with pity as the Matatu passes by slowly, like soldiers saluting the president and other dignitaries during a parade on a national holiday at Kasarani Stadium. It's a silent salute, giving their last respects to yet another one who has joined the list of “the fallen ones.” After a brief moment of “recognizing your efforts” to redeem your entire clan, the trigger-happy “Crusader” will offer his final diagnosis of your likely problem and say in very low tones, while shaking his head in sadness, “Kipar Sherehe werone!” (Huyo Kijana alimalizwa na Sherehe!” Makutoroktoi Muren Kukotu Tich!show more

Thirsty Kipsoiwet 🇰🇪 🇳🇱

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