coleman spilde

@colemanjspilde • 6,400 subscribers

I am just a guy who does a lot of stuff. senior culture writer & film critic @salon.

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coleman spilde

Shorts

her voice suddenly splitting in two?

This being that clip of family guy where lois says “9/11 was bad”

sarah paulson’s dialogue on all’s fair is exclusively half-baked, nearly unintelligible insults, but after spending the first episode and a half lamenting how badly hair and makeup fucked up glenn close, this read got a nice little laugh outta me

This video delights me. I love imagining that three witches sisters are down there having drinks together. From miniature cauldrons brimming with smoke. Witch gossip. Their friend’s new broom is really ugly or something.

Her infectious ebullient joy. Meanwhile two songs earlier she’s asking who Debi Mazar is. When people ask “why would I ever pay $5 to watch Ajay react to something” well I think it’s bc there’s something special to her being purely interested in whether the music moves her.

watched the season premiere of real housewives of atlanta after taking a gummy and this jump scare ghostly editing threw me for a loop and made me laugh so hard i started wheezing

the madonna and sabrina song

people who have never written a word professionally in their life when they say things are poorly written just because they don’t agree

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Don’t mean to be hyperbolic but this is genuinely one of the most compelling things I’ve ever heard a famous person say about surviving paparazzi-driven celebrity culture my jaw is kind of on the ground.

Jimmy casually transitioning into the next topic as if she didn’t reveal something truly bananas is killing me

hate to be the gay guy who screamed out loud when chloë sevigny stepped out of a car smoking a cigarette in the new charli xcx video but i who am i kidding it’s exactly what i live and breathe for

andy cohen being the one to break the news of david lynch’s passing to patricia arquette (or at least the first person to speak with her about it publicly) and saying “i was wondering if any of you worked with him…” don’t piss me off

that time of year for an old favorite

“sue me i want to be wanted” such a beautifully brazen, open-hearted embrace of naked human desire in all its mortifying glory, succinctly scribbled into one brilliant line. she’s god to me for this song alone….and that’s not even to mention thirst trap

I, I WANNA DIE. I WISH I LIVED A DIFFERENT LIFE, I LOST THE TIME. CAN’T GET IT BACK AND SO I CRY ALL DAY AND NIGHT.

can’t stop thinking about the basement jaxx needle drop that bookends the first film. perfect choice. they don’t, can’t, and won’t make em like this anymore.

watching clips of real housewives of potomac’s own stacey rusch peddling qvc crap and almost had a lung collapse at the way she advertised this royal blue turtleneck tunic with festival camel embroidery

everyone talking about kim’s “not kourtney” group chat on the premiere of the kardashians but not enough people mentioning the two-minute sequence where khloé explains her deathly fear of whales over an intense orchestral score

In the least snobbiest way possible I can’t believe so many people didn’t know about Emmy Rossum’s perfect Imogen-Enya song but NOW is the time for everyone to open their hearts to the gloriously ornate tragedy, romance, and faggotry that is Schumacher’s Phantom of the Opera.

Does anyone else think about when Monster was featured in the album trailer for The Fame Monster

still just love how explosive and insecure “sympathy is a knife” is. loud, abrasive and upset. total vulnerability that isn’t masquerading as superiority. probably one of the great modern song metaphors.

The intros for each week’s episode of The Soup being the late 2000s’ prototype for the modern out-of-context clip account, or adding an unrelated gif of garcelle beauvais to a tweet.

started life with la toya and every single scene is this spectacularly trecartin-esque

why oh why did i just find out tonight that kim gordon’s entrance in ‘boarding gate’ is her stomping into a room and sternly speaking fluent cantonese

everything from her saying “wait what does that mean?” timed perfectly on the melody to “wipe away the residue” to each micro discovery after. golden.

and funnily enough this horribly disorganized and pedestrian album cover matches the positively ear-splitting music so, in that way, it’s actually a job well done!