Jordan Schmaltz's banner

Jordan Schmaltz

@J_Swish24 • 43,495 subscribers

Former 1st Round NHL Pick. Now in the game of comedy & podcasting on @HomeBy3Official @liveinfivepod @missincurfew. World Renowned as 93.1🎙️ @bookitHQ

Shorts

Imagine how hard this crushed David Goggins when he saw this clip? I bet he immediately drove to the gym to run a double marathon yelling at himself on repeat to “stay hard” while naked on the treadmill in the mirror.

Imagine how hard this crushed David Goggins when he saw this clip? I bet he immediately drove to the gym to run a double marathon yelling at himself on repeat to “stay hard” while naked on the treadmill in the mirror.

505,528 views

Love Mike Yeo getting absolutely big dogged by Rod The Rod. Fuck him. -People’s

Love Mike Yeo getting absolutely big dogged by Rod The Rod. Fuck him. -People’s

668,304 views

I’m 40 feet away from this chick. She’s talking on volume 200 for the entire coffee shop to hear for the better part of the last 30 minutes. It’s so loud that if I was sitting across from her chin I would tell her to shut the hell up. The problem is, not only isn’t she hooked up to the PA system- but she must have the brain of a goldfish to have absolutely zero awareness. If I had a football I’d do everyone in here a favor and throw it at her head. She’s told 18 stories that I could recite in a row at this point. How can you can be that retarded? Respectfully of course. I’ll hang up now. -93.1

I’m 40 feet away from this chick. She’s talking on volume 200 for the entire coffee shop to hear for the better part of the last 30 minutes. It’s so loud that if I was sitting across from her chin I would tell her to shut the hell up. The problem is, not only isn’t she hooked up to the PA system- but she must have the brain of a goldfish to have absolutely zero awareness. If I had a football I’d do everyone in here a favor and throw it at her head. She’s told 18 stories that I could recite in a row at this point. How can you can be that retarded? Respectfully of course. I’ll hang up now. -93.1

75,607 views

I love that Ovi stops 3 feet before the line every time during a bag skate. So sick

I love that Ovi stops 3 feet before the line every time during a bag skate. So sick

1,356,368 views

I’m not here to talk about the time Cole Huston who self proclaims himself as “Magic” and his 10 BU buddies hit up their agent 2 hours before our HB3 show in Boston (that was sold out) and asked me for tickets and then walked out mid show because they felt like they were too good to laugh. They were sitting in VIP on the stage. 93.1 tried to do them a solid as I was appreciative they were fans. What did we get in return? Literally a walk off. Was that a big reason BU probably sucked this year? Probably. That’s not what I’m here for though. I wish him the best. Would I want to have a beer with him? No I honestly wouldn’t. But that’s baseball. And that’s how the game goes. I still hope he does well. And he’s got a way better chance of playing way longer than I did in the National so it seems. Good luck fella. You’re paying for tickets next time and I’m stuffing you in the pigeon deck. You gotta re-earn my respect that’s worth nothing. -Unc Swish

I’m not here to talk about the time Cole Huston who self proclaims himself as “Magic” and his 10 BU buddies hit up their agent 2 hours before our HB3 show in Boston (that was sold out) and asked me for tickets and then walked out mid show because they felt like they were too good to laugh. They were sitting in VIP on the stage. 93.1 tried to do them a solid as I was appreciative they were fans. What did we get in return? Literally a walk off. Was that a big reason BU probably sucked this year? Probably. That’s not what I’m here for though. I wish him the best. Would I want to have a beer with him? No I honestly wouldn’t. But that’s baseball. And that’s how the game goes. I still hope he does well. And he’s got a way better chance of playing way longer than I did in the National so it seems. Good luck fella. You’re paying for tickets next time and I’m stuffing you in the pigeon deck. You gotta re-earn my respect that’s worth nothing. -Unc Swish

393,318 views

“Sometimes they go in, sometimes they don’t. That’s baseball” -Nick Schmaltz, post game after bunking the GWG in OT + adding another in regulation for good measure. #TusksUp

“Sometimes they go in, sometimes they don’t. That’s baseball” -Nick Schmaltz, post game after bunking the GWG in OT + adding another in regulation for good measure. #TusksUp

335,125 views

Ace, Coop here 🤣🤣🤣

Ace, Coop here 🤣🤣🤣

486,618 views

Folks, let’s turn our attention to the USHL and head over to the Resch Center in beautiful Green Bay Wisconsin. I’ve never seen a fight celebrated harder than a game 7 OT winner in the Stanley Cup let alone by the guy who wasn’t even in the fight. Imagine doing the Bobby Orr jump because your goalie chucked at center ice during the 2nd period in game 16 of the season? The whole team celebrating on the bench like the countdown is on winning a championship as the clock strikes zero 🤣🤣 To be young again man. What a bunch of dipshits. And I mean that in the best way possible. You love to see the enthusiasm. Thats baseball.

Folks, let’s turn our attention to the USHL and head over to the Resch Center in beautiful Green Bay Wisconsin. I’ve never seen a fight celebrated harder than a game 7 OT winner in the Stanley Cup let alone by the guy who wasn’t even in the fight. Imagine doing the Bobby Orr jump because your goalie chucked at center ice during the 2nd period in game 16 of the season? The whole team celebrating on the bench like the countdown is on winning a championship as the clock strikes zero 🤣🤣 To be young again man. What a bunch of dipshits. And I mean that in the best way possible. You love to see the enthusiasm. Thats baseball.

427,639 views

Mitchie Griddy Marner has to do this when he accepts the Conn Smitty

Mitchie Griddy Marner has to do this when he accepts the Conn Smitty

143,863 views

Folks I wanted to give some love to #LeafsForever head equipment manager Bobby Hastings. The way he tickles the knobs of his players sticks while they are on the ice is Beethoven like. The grace, the awareness, the overall harmony is pure bliss. Imagine having that type of feel for another man’s stick? There is only one Bobby Hastings. 📞📞

Folks I wanted to give some love to #LeafsForever head equipment manager Bobby Hastings. The way he tickles the knobs of his players sticks while they are on the ice is Beethoven like. The grace, the awareness, the overall harmony is pure bliss. Imagine having that type of feel for another man’s stick? There is only one Bobby Hastings. 📞📞

720,676 views

The biggest cardinal sin in hockey. NEVER go chin over shin… Ryan Lindgren said you reach, I’ll teach fella.

The biggest cardinal sin in hockey. NEVER go chin over shin… Ryan Lindgren said you reach, I’ll teach fella.

395,563 views

I can’t stop watching this. Jimmy Montgomery singing along in the dying minutes down a goal thinking about the high school prom date that got away. The look of nostalgia filled with hope to the heavens as his team tries to even the score. Poetic

I can’t stop watching this. Jimmy Montgomery singing along in the dying minutes down a goal thinking about the high school prom date that got away. The look of nostalgia filled with hope to the heavens as his team tries to even the score. Poetic

614,067 views

Not trying to steal your thunder BucciOT.Com .. simply playing the game of connoisseur. Chicken parm as long as your arm. Buried the entire thing and now I’m on heart attack watch aka #JammerWatch Lincoln Square. Cafe Fiorello📍 -93.1

Not trying to steal your thunder BucciOT.Com .. simply playing the game of connoisseur. Chicken parm as long as your arm. Buried the entire thing and now I’m on heart attack watch aka #JammerWatch Lincoln Square. Cafe Fiorello📍 -93.1

194,719 views

As an older brother I can confidently say, I didn’t teach him much, but I can say this stuck with his chin. “When you got no angle, it’s time to dangle”. What a slip by #8 that was. That was Justin Timberlake on Janet Jackson at the Super Bowl half time show like. Oh my cheeky nip slip exposing Donovan Brayden McNabb like a hired Sedona photographer. To OT WE GO!! #TusksUp -People’s

As an older brother I can confidently say, I didn’t teach him much, but I can say this stuck with his chin. “When you got no angle, it’s time to dangle”. What a slip by #8 that was. That was Justin Timberlake on Janet Jackson at the Super Bowl half time show like. Oh my cheeky nip slip exposing Donovan Brayden McNabb like a hired Sedona photographer. To OT WE GO!! #TusksUp -People’s

157,180 views

I mean I get the idea Robertson is trying to do here. We call it the “slingshot”.. When you press on the back of your teammates pants with your twig to help them catch the opposing player normally on an odd man rush or breakaway. It really works as a slingshot. However, In this instance in no case is that maneuver needed NOR necessary. #1 Dvorak doesn’t even have the puck. #2 it’s pre season. Bonehead play by number 89. Let’s just hope Willy Styles is okay. #LeafsForever What you think fellas? Shane O'Brien Rob Gucci

I mean I get the idea Robertson is trying to do here. We call it the “slingshot”.. When you press on the back of your teammates pants with your twig to help them catch the opposing player normally on an odd man rush or breakaway. It really works as a slingshot. However, In this instance in no case is that maneuver needed NOR necessary. #1 Dvorak doesn’t even have the puck. #2 it’s pre season. Bonehead play by number 89. Let’s just hope Willy Styles is okay. #LeafsForever What you think fellas? Shane O'Brien Rob Gucci

645,031 views

Every stadium has one unique thing about it. This is Toronto’s at Rogers Centre ⤵️

Every stadium has one unique thing about it. This is Toronto’s at Rogers Centre ⤵️

373,165 views

The ole bailout but make it look like you’re competing. Classic. I used to do this myself from time to time. Not trying to hate on the fella Mitchie Sheets $$ but you ain’t gonna win anything playing with a parachute on your back at this time of year that’s just faxx. #LeafsForever #NHLBRUINS - 📞📞

The ole bailout but make it look like you’re competing. Classic. I used to do this myself from time to time. Not trying to hate on the fella Mitchie Sheets $$ but you ain’t gonna win anything playing with a parachute on your back at this time of year that’s just faxx. #LeafsForever #NHLBRUINS - 📞📞

620,383 views

Fellas and Lady fellas, taking you to the chin of Vladivostok Russia where not only the radiation from North Korea can be felt but apparently your team captain goes full Terry Rozier from time to time cutting deals with the Russian mob. You’re playing so god far away from reality that you think you can get away with tucking one in the back of your own net to make sure the first period over hits. What the hell was Libor Sulak trying to accomplish on this play other than cash in for an extra $750,000 ruble which is equivalent to roughly $10,000 USD. Is he playing that puck to his partner and ends up hooding it too much like a trap draw 4 iron stinger out of the pine? What is Lib Sulak doing here folks? What a solid tuck by the 31 year old out of the Czech Republic. Only in the Kontiental #KHL -People’s

Fellas and Lady fellas, taking you to the chin of Vladivostok Russia where not only the radiation from North Korea can be felt but apparently your team captain goes full Terry Rozier from time to time cutting deals with the Russian mob. You’re playing so god far away from reality that you think you can get away with tucking one in the back of your own net to make sure the first period over hits. What the hell was Libor Sulak trying to accomplish on this play other than cash in for an extra $750,000 ruble which is equivalent to roughly $10,000 USD. Is he playing that puck to his partner and ends up hooding it too much like a trap draw 4 iron stinger out of the pine? What is Lib Sulak doing here folks? What a solid tuck by the 31 year old out of the Czech Republic. Only in the Kontiental #KHL -People’s

183,595 views

Prime reason why you shouldn’t play star players in a pre season game. 7-8 pre season games is beyond dumb. Playing guys for what? To have minor league guys run around looking to make an impression? If I was a GM I’d let my core of 5-8 players maybe play 2 exhibitions. I’d sacrifice them being a bit rusty games 1-3 in the regular season vs risking serious injury from some dipshit running around like a chicken with his chin cut off. And I’m not faulting those guys either (the guys trying to make the team) they have a job to do too. Jobs are won within these games. But Makar takes one up high last night, Cooley gets stapled. Both don’t return. Asset protection folks that’s business 101. I can help teach some of these GM’s if needed. - People’s

Prime reason why you shouldn’t play star players in a pre season game. 7-8 pre season games is beyond dumb. Playing guys for what? To have minor league guys run around looking to make an impression? If I was a GM I’d let my core of 5-8 players maybe play 2 exhibitions. I’d sacrifice them being a bit rusty games 1-3 in the regular season vs risking serious injury from some dipshit running around like a chicken with his chin cut off. And I’m not faulting those guys either (the guys trying to make the team) they have a job to do too. Jobs are won within these games. But Makar takes one up high last night, Cooley gets stapled. Both don’t return. Asset protection folks that’s business 101. I can help teach some of these GM’s if needed. - People’s

258,117 views

The Oilers faithful told me to go shutter myself after suggesting they should trade Bouchard last season due to the fact of the type of money he was going to demand with the numbers he had. You guys then paid him 10 and a 🪝 to be a PowerPlay specialist. This is what 10.5 gets you. What a play eh -People’s

The Oilers faithful told me to go shutter myself after suggesting they should trade Bouchard last season due to the fact of the type of money he was going to demand with the numbers he had. You guys then paid him 10 and a 🪝 to be a PowerPlay specialist. This is what 10.5 gets you. What a play eh -People’s

190,470 views

Videos

Anya Rossi

sweetdream.ai

SweetDream.ai•Sponsored•Livecam

Watch Anya Live

Anya is streaming live right now! Join her private show and enjoy exclusive content.

Exclusive private shows

1.2k viewers online

Private Show

Join now for exclusive access

Free preview available • Premium content

Forget the D list influencers there strictly for the instagram pic. These are the worst kind of people at the US Open. Johnny ear piece. 🤦🏻

Forget the D list influencers there strictly for the instagram pic. These are the worst kind of people at the US Open. Johnny ear piece. 🤦🏻

Jordan Schmaltz

6,639,208 views • 1 year ago

I think the kids call this the Baltimore Lean? Holy fak fella. Mix in a water eh -93.1

I think the kids call this the Baltimore Lean? Holy fak fella. Mix in a water eh -93.1

Jordan Schmaltz

234,673 views • 1 month ago

This drill doesn’t make you faster or a better skater If anything it’s okay in doses for conditioning purposes. The reality is resistance bands on the ice when used for “training” end up shortening your stride and decreases your technique. The best skaters, have the best glide and most efficient recovery back to the middle supplemented with power built off the ice. This is 1980’s style thinking. Let me know if you want to become a better skater Gavin, my uncle Marc is still the best in the business teaching the basics of improving a stride. -Coach Swish

This drill doesn’t make you faster or a better skater If anything it’s okay in doses for conditioning purposes. The reality is resistance bands on the ice when used for “training” end up shortening your stride and decreases your technique. The best skaters, have the best glide and most efficient recovery back to the middle supplemented with power built off the ice. This is 1980’s style thinking. Let me know if you want to become a better skater Gavin, my uncle Marc is still the best in the business teaching the basics of improving a stride. -Coach Swish

Jordan Schmaltz

216,763 views • 1 month ago

F*ck it. One liner mixtape from yours truly. And yes I did say wrench on national television -93.1

F*ck it. One liner mixtape from yours truly. And yes I did say wrench on national television -93.1

Jordan Schmaltz

599,710 views • 4 months ago

The biggest cardinal sin in hockey. Never EVER go chin over shin..

The biggest cardinal sin in hockey. Never EVER go chin over shin..

Jordan Schmaltz

2,074,305 views • 1 year ago

My dad got a hole in one on the wrong hole 🤣 We need a ruling on this one USGA I’ll hang up and listen. -93.1

My dad got a hole in one on the wrong hole 🤣 We need a ruling on this one USGA I’ll hang up and listen. -93.1

Jordan Schmaltz

85,961 views • 26 days ago

Who is running the Swedish bench? Not playing a guy that’s tucked 48 one year in the national. What a dipshit #FREEFIL -93.1

Who is running the Swedish bench? Not playing a guy that’s tucked 48 one year in the national. What a dipshit #FREEFIL -93.1

Jordan Schmaltz

515,177 views • 6 months ago

🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨 Just saved the entire city of Chicago. I don’t need the big thank you’s or handshakes. Just know leaders lead from the front. And that’s what I do best. Saved a guys life. Not because I wanted to. But nobody is dying on my watch while all the other peasants in this city walked by. -Swish

🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨 Just saved the entire city of Chicago. I don’t need the big thank you’s or handshakes. Just know leaders lead from the front. And that’s what I do best. Saved a guys life. Not because I wanted to. But nobody is dying on my watch while all the other peasants in this city walked by. -Swish

Jordan Schmaltz

103,801 views • 1 month ago

We lost a good one earlier this month. Condolences to fellow Wisconsinite, Dick Porn and the entire family. 🙏 -93.1

We lost a good one earlier this month. Condolences to fellow Wisconsinite, Dick Porn and the entire family. 🙏 -93.1

Jordan Schmaltz

83,736 views • 1 month ago

The Morgan Wallen walk out is the best thing in showbiz. Camp Randall. Madison WI feat Perc Favre 🐐🐐

The Morgan Wallen walk out is the best thing in showbiz. Camp Randall. Madison WI feat Perc Favre 🐐🐐

Jordan Schmaltz

643,827 views • 1 year ago

Total scumbag move. What a joke.

Total scumbag move. What a joke.

Jordan Schmaltz

750,818 views • 1 year ago

🚨Official Press Release on Açaí #BowlGate: For those who don’t follow me on X, basically what happened was a certain group of Utah Mammoth fans accused me of “standing up” one of their members after making an effort to make things right (offering to buy an açaí bowl) despite the posse telling me I’m not welcome in Utah several times. I just want to get out in front of this and address the miscommunication on several levels. #1 This was never a date. Even though the “victim” went from being “scared” of me to wanting to take the next step in a relationship. This was a fan / to fan meet up. #2 if you win the lottery, you have to claim your prize. No hard feelings on my end towards the certain individual involved directly in the situation - let’s chalk that up to a miscommunication. Not once did this individual let me know they/ them were at the game. However, what do I have a problem with is the random asshole bystanders who know nothing about #BowlGate throwing gasoline on the fire and threatening my life over an açaí bowl. Imagine telling someone to kill themselves over an açaí bowl? You are the people I’m telling to go fk yourself. Let me make that clear. Still lots of love for the good people of Utah. No further comment at this time. -Swish

🚨Official Press Release on Açaí #BowlGate: For those who don’t follow me on X, basically what happened was a certain group of Utah Mammoth fans accused me of “standing up” one of their members after making an effort to make things right (offering to buy an açaí bowl) despite the posse telling me I’m not welcome in Utah several times. I just want to get out in front of this and address the miscommunication on several levels. #1 This was never a date. Even though the “victim” went from being “scared” of me to wanting to take the next step in a relationship. This was a fan / to fan meet up. #2 if you win the lottery, you have to claim your prize. No hard feelings on my end towards the certain individual involved directly in the situation - let’s chalk that up to a miscommunication. Not once did this individual let me know they/ them were at the game. However, what do I have a problem with is the random asshole bystanders who know nothing about #BowlGate throwing gasoline on the fire and threatening my life over an açaí bowl. Imagine telling someone to kill themselves over an açaí bowl? You are the people I’m telling to go fk yourself. Let me make that clear. Still lots of love for the good people of Utah. No further comment at this time. -Swish

Jordan Schmaltz

397,397 views • 10 months ago

The Hammer Wilson going chin to chin with arguably the biggest heavyweight of the last decade is so nails. Making all of Elmvale Ontario proud #10!!

The Hammer Wilson going chin to chin with arguably the biggest heavyweight of the last decade is so nails. Making all of Elmvale Ontario proud #10!!

Jordan Schmaltz

214,744 views • 5 months ago

🚨LET IT SNOW TOUR ☃️ tix🚨 CHI: MKE: PITTS: BUFF:

🚨LET IT SNOW TOUR ☃️ tix🚨 CHI: MKE: PITTS: BUFF:

Jordan Schmaltz

324,538 views • 10 months ago

Dave Jackson is such a pussy. Respectfully of course but Dave you probably agree with that too. You just agree because it’s easier. No opinion. No chin. Get this guy off the air. This is show business not powder puff. -93.1

Dave Jackson is such a pussy. Respectfully of course but Dave you probably agree with that too. You just agree because it’s easier. No opinion. No chin. Get this guy off the air. This is show business not powder puff. -93.1

Jordan Schmaltz

145,657 views • 4 months ago

Brock Nelson with a fresh Turkish fade is a dangerous man. Some dude on Long Island name Yusuf gives you the 1 to the 2 to the 3 Turkish butter fade. WOW Nelly looking dangerous.

Brock Nelson with a fresh Turkish fade is a dangerous man. Some dude on Long Island name Yusuf gives you the 1 to the 2 to the 3 Turkish butter fade. WOW Nelly looking dangerous.

Jordan Schmaltz

493,696 views • 1 year ago

🚨BREAKING: The People’s was kicked out of the Phoenix Mercury game before tip off by NBA / WNBA security escorted out of the Footprint Center peacefully.. (Live press conference)

🚨BREAKING: The People’s was kicked out of the Phoenix Mercury game before tip off by NBA / WNBA security escorted out of the Footprint Center peacefully.. (Live press conference)

Jordan Schmaltz

309,111 views • 1 year ago

Mike Babcock is officially back in the NHL.. his first interview as Head Coach #BecomingACock premieres in September. Stay tuned.

Mike Babcock is officially back in the NHL.. his first interview as Head Coach #BecomingACock premieres in September. Stay tuned.

Jordan Schmaltz

68,217 views • 2 months ago

I was down bad to start my Thursday. The libs got us again. Stay tucked Swishy. Yes I’m talking in third person. -93.1

I was down bad to start my Thursday. The libs got us again. Stay tucked Swishy. Yes I’m talking in third person. -93.1

Jordan Schmaltz

51,588 views • 1 month ago

What is the reward for finding Blake Snell’s chin? $10,000?

What is the reward for finding Blake Snell’s chin? $10,000?

Jordan Schmaltz

231,276 views • 10 months ago