chances of whiteboys getting laid?! ZERO!!! 🍤🤏🏼

Your chances of getting attacked by a moose are... low, but never zero: 😮show more

The chances of having Gehlee as your oomf are... low, but never zero.show more

Your chances of being attacked by a skunk are... low, but never zero.show more

Did you know, the chances of tripping over your... own knee-high fencing, and getting hit by a passing car, 2 seconds later — are astronomical... but again, never quite zero!show more

just this part of never getting laid

Your chances of being attacked by a shopping cart... are very low, but never zero. 🛒show more

Your chances of being attacked by a kangaroo after... skydiving is very low, but never zero.show more

The chances of being slapped by a random fish... are always extremely low, but never zero.show more

The chances of a baby, k!ll!ng you is low.... But never zero 😭😭show more

The chances of being slapped by a random fish... are always extremely low, but never zero.show more

The chances of being slapped by a random fish... are always extremely low, but never zeroshow more

FearBuck the chances of being ambushed by an unattended... shopping cart is very low, but never zeroshow more

Your chances of being attacked by a circular cattle... watering trough are very low, but never zero.show more

2026 is going well, since Jackson’s been getting recognized... on the apps and irl 🤣🍤 must be hilarious watching his chances disappear as they realize they’ve seen him and his tiny virgin pp online before 🤭show more

The chances of being run over by a monster... truck driven by a fox are slim, but never zero.show more

The chances of Brian Kelly performing a blood sacrifice... to steal your soul are very low…….. …but never zeroshow more

Zero chance of getting pulled over right now

Chances that a cow steals your shoes are slim,... but never zeroshow more