These are ingenious, fellas. They work every time.

Tried this with my boss. You wouldn’t believe how much freedom I enjoy now.

This man must want to see his fellow man extinct

Can vouch works every time.

He forgot "be quiet"

I applaud you brother for helping out the fellas. What a good man you are.

Me and my 3 ex wives approve this message 👌 😂

„Some people just wanna see the world burn“

"Calm down, you're acting like your mother - your sister never acts like this; are you on your period?"

Absolutely use these phrases and report back - if possible.

Yup! Any one of those sentences, become death warrants even before you finish saying them. Let´s just hope there are no dumb ones attenpting to use them in real life...

"You're acting like your mother" The mother :

You basically want to kill us right?

These actually work too well. 8/10, hopefully the next one can't fight.

This man is already dead. It's amazing he lived long enough to make the recording.

"Are you done?"

That's how all those "tips and tricks" from manosphere about reverse psychology sound to me. While this is parody, men really love giving each other bad advice on how to treat women. Intrasexual competition through sabotaging is not exclusive to females.

😂 Funniest WRONG information on the internet today! The men who believe this will end up sleeping on the sofa tonight. 😂

Before you can utter the words "Rel..." you get clancy'd.

Using these regularly will absolutely make sure you don't have further woman problems, or a woman at all for that matter.

You forgot 6.) - Are we gonna have sex tonight, or…? - This reminds her that you’re always thinking of her, no matter what.

I always say, "Chill out, or you're sleeping on the couch tonight." "Oh, and by the way, we are leaving the seat up from now on."

This could form the basis of a new 'Death Wish' trilogy.

you run a funeral home, don't you?

They love when you say “calm down.”

Just give a warm smile. Lean back make full eye contact, gently chuckle and say. “Hey, It’s alright. We had some good times together though didn’t we?” Then pick up your phone and smile at it.

😂 #6 "See? This is why you're gaining weight. Cortisol." <<< This helps her understand her body.

My man after trying this

This guy has definitely been divorced like ten times, and that’s why he thinks he understands women, since he’s had so much experience with them.

I wonder who will be visiting these husbands in ICU.

this guy a divorce lawyer?

I pulled #5 out on my ex-wife during the divorce fight, lol. She practically turned purple, because nothing hits home like a buried truth.

That smile at the end

This guy is yelling "Fire!" in a movie theater! Gonna' get some guys killed!